


when you speak i hear silence

by Love_Psycho



Category: Tales of Series, Tales of the Abyss
Genre: Angst, Family, Gen, introspective
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-28
Updated: 2016-10-28
Packaged: 2018-08-27 13:39:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8403784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Love_Psycho/pseuds/Love_Psycho
Summary: Luke is a child and he dreams a child's dreams. But his reality is vastly different.





	

**Author's Note:**

> So guess who got into Tales of the Abyss? Sorta. Kinda. Nothing with the game or anime yet but well...okay it's complicated. I apparently have issues here. But I like it enough I wanna fix the parts the piss me off so.
> 
> As is, I've been coming up with various ideas that I will work on. Of course now is when the muse gets active...where was the dratted muse when I was working on original stuff?
> 
> This one shot came out surprisingly fast because of course this fandom needs more angst. Of course. (note sarcasm)
> 
> Title comes from [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9O2Rjn1azc) song.

There are many things Luke thinks, _feels_ , deep within but will never speak out loud.

Such as what he thinks Asch is to him, what Master Van ~~is~~ was to him.

Asch is strange to him. He hates him, Luke that knows that very well. Still, he wants to know Asch, to get closer to him. Maybe it's because he's the original Luke fon Fabre, maybe his fonons draw Luke to Asch due to that similarity.

Still, if Luke ever wanted a brother he thinks Asch would have been his. Despite his cruelty Luke thinks Asch might like him in some strange way, which is why he's so hard on him. Asch hates that he is weak because he wants Luke to be strong. Which is why Luke strangely wants him as a proper brother – Luke doesn't know how to be strong but Asch does.

But that's just a dream right now, with Luke as the ~~failure~~ fake, the ~~worthless~~ replica and Asch as the original.

Strange, that Luke sometimes dreams of the strangest things. What might have been if Master Van had chosen differently. If he had been more than just a tool to him. Another life that is beyond impossible and yet possible in his sleep.

The truth is, even now Master Van is his father. But he dare not say it, even as he can't let go of the title he gave him to hide it even when he was younger and more naïve. Just a child and with a distant father, a sickly mother, and servants who gave him everything he wanted and yet nothing at all.

Guy had been more of a parent to him than Duke Fabre or even Lady Susanne, what with her illness. Master Van had definitely been his father figure, the one he loved like family, had been family. A father is one's creator and caretaker and Master Van ~~is~~ was both.

But it had been a lie, one among many others that Master Van made for his goals.

Still, Luke wishes and dreams of another world, a lie of his own he wishes he could drown himself in and never return. Where there is a true family to him, an elder brother in Asch, another brother in Guy, a sister in Tear.

Sometimes even Natalia is there, always with Asch because _of course_ they would be together in that way, in the romantic way, in such a perfect world. Jade even visits at times, a strange uncle that doesn't understand children and people and yet understands more than he thinks. Anise is a weird cousin in this one, the one Luke kinda loves and kinda wants to avoid when she becomes unbearable.

Ion is his friend, someone who's happy to hang out and be with. They play child games because that's what they are, _children_ , and Luke is small and happy because there is nothing to fear there.

And over it all is always Master Van, except Luke can call him _father_ here and be happy for it, to be praised genuinely and taught and loved.

Sometimes that strange God-General Legretta is there, brought on by small stories Tear tells of how she ~~raised~~ trained her and how much even now Tear respects her. She's beside Master Van and smiling too, even though Luke doesn't know what her smile looks like when he wakes.

And that's what he does. Yes, he always _wakes_ and he has to face reality, has to pick up his sword against ~~Father~~ Master Van and save the world. Because no one else can do it, wants to do it, or even could comprehend what it takes.

Luke is so **young** and yet he feels so old. And every word he speaks to Master Van is but silence, something he will never hear. Not truly, never listening to anyone not even his sister Tear much less ~~replica~~ Luke. His lie of a son, something that was meaningfully meaningless and a defective tool, a means to the ends. Luke speaks and yet doesn't speak to Van, saying so many things and nothing at all.

Words that fly out from his mouth over and over with no proof they even existed.

With some words that will never come out as they should and even if they did Luke knows the truth.

Nothing would change, for even if the Score hadn't decreed it something _**else**_ did.

Luke knows this.

Still...

...sometimes he dreams.

**Author's Note:**

> Thoughts, feelings, and feedback greatly appreciated so if you like comment below.


End file.
